Humanity - At Play Before the Holy Presence

I miss playing and singing music. 

I miss going to the church playing without the light switch in perfect solitude.

I miss the music of the winds and my strings as I paced before the high altar.

I miss the freedom, the urgent prayers, and supplications from my instrument.

I miss the physicality of acoustics when the tones filled the sanctuary. 

I miss the abandonment of the self to prefer the pure excitement of the Creator's Presence and His Joy.

At play behind the locked doors of the mental hospital when playing in the dark for the dark;

At play behind the locked doors of the Alzheimer's floor when playing in the dark for the dark;

At play behind the battle lines of the VA hospital when playing in the dark for the dark;

I found Jesus in the dark, from the dark. 

The anxious one who sat in a foreign bath of mud;

The tiny form laying in fetal pose;


The great venerable who's body and mind became dust yet sang along...

It was always the Dark Ones who gave me the Holy Presence. 

When Jesus calls me, I will know His voice in the dark without good hands and lungs.

When Jesus heals me, I will return and play again.

Human Rights - Truth Teachers - What I learned from The Different.

God, in His perfect wisdom, has allowed me the privilege of a child-like heart and mind to seek Him. As a Judeo-Christian/Wesleyan from a diverse culture, I've had the wonderful exposure to so many belief systems that taught about a loving Creator and my responsibility to others.

The Roman Catholics taught me that anything God uses is sacred; His benches, buildings, and people. I am very thankful for the privilege of attending Tridentine Mass with head covered, extra knee padding, and sitting in the back corner of the sanctuary. In my own church I am careful how my Bible is laying on my lap or on the pew, and showing respect for God's property. 

The Jewish friends taught me that I am a part of the Creator's plan: I am His child and God loves me. Every part of my life belongs to God and I must pray for the desire to love God most by respecting human life above my own. They taught me to want to love God better. 

The Muslim people I have met have taught me that we are indeed similar in our efforts to honor God through our daily life and routine habits. The idea that my prayers are similar to those of our faithful Muslim friends, makes me feel incredibly unworthy of a great God-given blessing.  God has His children everywhere. 

My dear Hindu friends have reminded me of the importance of 'now.' This singular moment is far more important than the past or future. This is a very important tenant in my faith, "Now is the time of salvation (2 Corinthians 6:2)." 

The ancient tribal religion of the Native Americans, Cherokee, taught me the sanctity of earth, sky, water, and all living creatures. The Creator gave life and we have the responsibiltiy of protecting and using creation wisely. God have mercy on our gluttony and waste. 

The dear Buddhist/Zen friends constantly remind me that the search for Truth demands constant, holistic effort with no distraction. The goal is to eliminate any distraction that does not encourage the striving for Truth in all matters; I must always 'do my best.' The dear Buddhist habits of prayer, meditation, mantra, and discipline have encouraged my own goal of  'living in a constant spirit of prayer.' Yes, I want to know my Lord Jesus in the most personal relationship He will allow me and anything that encourages that relationship is always good.

I confess aprehension toward Confusian/Taoism despite their incredible contribution toward social order and self awareness. I want to think of self awareness and total discipline are life goals rather than an accomplishment. I simply would rather have Lord Jesus hold my hand and guide me at all times. I hope in my Lord's wisdom, He will allow me to study and learn these noble ideas and yes, especially martial arts, in hopes my Lord will delight in me. 

I am thankful for a perfectly loving God who simply wants quality time with me and always wants His best in my life.

Study - Why do you need a college degree?

Anita, why bother with a college degree? I turn in circles and wonder.

Anita, why do you need a college degree? I turn in circles and wonder.

Anita, you don't need schooling. You can always get a job at the grocery store.

Anita, you don't need college with all the factories in town.

Anita, when are you going to grow up and contribute to society? I turn in circles and wonder.


There was a person who no one wanted; people thought they were too much work.
There was a person who no one understood; people are afraid of the unknown.
There was a person who was despised by popular opinion; no one really thought about them.
There was a person who was alone; very convenient for others.
There was an inmate who learned a hard lesson the hard way; ignorance was bliss for a while.

Public opinion says that I am homophobic because of my Wesleyan faith roots.
Public opinion says that because of my obesity, I am destined to clean their toilets.
Public opinion says that because I am white, I am racist.
Public opinion says that I can't trust Muslims, African, Asian, Hillbillies, Cops, Teachers, Preachers...anyone.
Public opinion says that certain people need to be ignorant so others can learn.

Our Father Abraham knew Jehovah Jireh.

Lord and Savior, True and Kind...please help us think...please help us love...please help us understand...

Anita needs a Savior.

Humanity - Two of Me - Or Just Live with It

I remember hearing a conference speaker, and maybe you have as well, open her speech with, "If everyone was just like me, the world would be a better place." Her pep talk, despite her good intentions, only made me feel less empowered. The ugly truth and nagging problem is that there is just one of me and I will have to just live with 'it.'

'It' is this body, mind, soul, and strength, such as it is, as well as the nagging common income that I will have to live with in this reality.

Here is my wish list of the things I want to do if only 'It' would be sufficient:

1. Most important: With pain-free hands I want to volunteer music therapy for non-responsive patients.
2. Make and publish my own handmade blank books with scriptural name acrostic for my loved ones. If you don't understand it's OK. I confess freely my need for academic upgrade. A = And lo I am with you always; B = Be not afraid I am with you; etc. 
3. Live near my parents and sister's family so I can see them regularly. I hope they will like me. 
4. Enroll in a Jewish university and study and master Library Sciences to prepare for service as well as my own studies. Minor in Hebrew language and Religion. Take my parents to tour Israel.
5. Take an academic tour, regardless of time, through Mongolia, Tibet, China, Korea, and Japan. I want to focus on Martial Arts, Language/calligraphy, History, Religion, and Arts. While learning, volunteer and anonymously fund an orphan's college education. I would have to request a Kosher and vegetarian diet during my Asian studies.

There you have it; five ideas to create a great servant to make our world better.  It may be impossible for 'It' but who knows who may find inspiration.

Humanity - Hidden Secrets in the Top Floor

If the elevator in a posh building has twelve floors to select, there is usually an upper, additional floor accessible only by a special pass or key. Sometimes this top floor is used in reserve for private events or storage. I wonder often if the top floor happenings are good or bad. I wonder if people on the top floor are ok. I never liked the idea of secrets, tricks, propaganda, or exaggerated promises impossible to keep. The top floor is often a very scary place full of uncontrollable imaginations that destroy hope. 

The secret place of my soul is very much like the top floor only the elite evil may know about. Evil took the one key to access the inner places of my soul, which are the noisiest and unruly place to be just like the top floor of mayhem where abuse and destruction of hope are unpublished stories for front page news. 

Despite the elegant entrance and posh elevator, the top floor, that horrible place of evil, destroyed the inner peace the Good God Himself intended to give me freely. When my soul was wasted to nothingness by the abuse on the top floor, I cried to God, the Clean and Pure Creator to help me, save me, from the inner destruction. 

God came and took the key from evil, and now my secret place, the top floor, is a very safe refuge for me and where just God can live comfortably. 

May your secret soul places, your top floor, always be where God lives comfortably. 

Marriage - You Love Me How?

I am clean and as neat as possible.

My hands are callused and my nails are torn and broken from labor.
My hands are too sore to play songs and my voice is too gruff to sing.
My face and dark eyes are worn from lack of sleep and fatigue.
My neglected hair is cut off to survive in the hot sun.
My patched clothes betray my secret poverty.
Baren by choice, unconditional love from the womb is impossible.
My fats hang from my body like unwanted wineskins; who knows how to treat and heal imposing obesity?
I have earned no money in my life yet given all.

Through this thick and ugly wall, how can you really love me?

My champion longs for my company.
My champion loves to see my constant efforts to bless others.
My champion longs for and prays for me rather than the little money I earn.
My champion loves to hug me and dance with me when no one is watching.
My champion enjoys giving me ease and comfort.
My champion opens my doors of wonderful delights and carries my burdens.
My champion walks on the outside near the road ready to protect me as the most precious to him.

My champion holds my hand when walking, sitting together.

My champion takes pleasure in my joys rather than my sorrows.
My champion defends my honor with the fresh anointing God provides.

This champion provides for my needs and allows me the coveted choices only allowed through human dignity given by God's Grace alone.

My champion sees me as God sees; He can see someone beautiful. 

You can love me without the shovel, broom, and mop.
You can love me receiving nothing in return.
You can love me without imagining, 'what am I going to get out of her?'
You can love me without regret when I sin.

Maybe if I were pretty...

I could engage in meaningful discussions with the sages learning and teaching.
I could volunteer my time and contribute to the edification of human life.

I could use my hands to bless others. 

I could open my home to anyone who wants the company of like minds.
I could travel and spend time with precious loved ones.

 Maybe if I were pretty...

Your first thoughts and opinions of me would be kind.

Oh, my, how you could love my soul.

Obesity - If You Know Me

I know all about you.
I've heard all about you.
I have you all figured out.
You remind me of...


If you know me, you know nothing; if you know Christ, you know all.

If you know me, then you would delight in praying for my recovery.

If you know me, then you would love my success.

If you know me, then you would be my refuge, my protection.

If you know me, then...

Why do you laugh at my failing?

Why do you take an advantage of my dismissal?

Why do you comment on my name without truth or purpose?

If all you know is me, then you know nothing.

You and I need a Savior. I am soul.

Human Rights - Removing Crosses: Offensive for a Reason

Religious symbols and memorials all testify of individual faith and real events; why are so many opposed or offended by them? Memorial parks now have many vacancies where tombs, statues, and images have been removed because someone was offended by them.

If the event that raised the memorial had never happened, there would be no memorial. Confederacy would still exist as would the legal trade of human beings as a commodity. After over two hundred years of slavery and Southern independence, I suppose no one would really care about the issue today. The North would mind their own business, as is custom even today, and the South would simply live free with their slaves and trade rights.

We certainly wouldn't have memorials to the fallen to remind us of our sin because we would be simply living free with our economic freedom and independence and sinless.

Sinless...sinless...sinless; now there is a thought. The cold, hard truth is we did sin and had to erect memorials to remind us of those sins. Statues of General Robert E. Lee, Stonewall Jackson, southern soldiers were erected to remind us what we as a people suppressed, abused, and used human beings for our own benefit and amusement. These southern people cried from their graves that we the living would learn from their tragic sin and their sin would never become our sin.

Those who think themselves academic will try to explain the atrocities of the past as a tidy little essay and sound impressive and even some sounding victimized, but I say, please do your own research. Work, dig, labor, and sweat blood for the good of humanity lest we forget the crimes against humanity committed before us.

Walking through the Holocaust Museum will offend me;
Walking through Bull Run National Park will offend me;
Walking through the Chinese Railroad Workers Exhibit in San Francisco will offend me;
Walking through a Japanese Internment Camp will offend me;
Walking through a factory museum with pictures of poor women and children labor will offend me;
Walking through a cinema history museum will offend me;
Walking through a Coal Mine exhibit in West Virginia will offend me...

Surely I would never be so capable of such inhumanity... or would I? My DNA suggests UK Celtic, Scandinavian, and Eastern Europe Semitic, but money always talks and I may have a price.

Oh God, Oh God have mercy on me and on the whole world for our rejection of truth.

What are we to do without the reminders? After all, we are only human and money talks.

Surely I would never be so capable of such inhumanity... or would I? The Cross of Jesus reminds me that I am offended by sin, by My Sin. What would I do without the Holy Reminder?

Study - Lady Academia - Most Ignorant, Part 2

Why does Lady Academia seem to lose the war against ignorance? She fights against popular opinion and popular news for the Truth, yet seem to become the fatality.

Truth is never popular or exciting. No one really wants the truth in daily life. Truth is not popular because it is often inconvenient and even painful.

As a Judaic Christian, the Old Testament teaches that the Hebrew people are God's chosen people who are to witness to the world of the One True God. After the first patriarchs, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, it seems they were destined to a very dark and sad future. Joseph, Moses, and a few righteous judges in the midst were the golden characters, but sadly the rest of the story seems rather bleak. Hebrews have proclaimed and witnessed of the One True God only to find oppression, defeat and constant holocaust throughout history.  They were oppressed, conquered, enslaved, exiled, and systematically exterminated throughout history, yet the faith in the One True God survives and thankfully influences the entire human race; I am very thankful for the faith in the One True God.

It is all too easy for the self-centered religious community to develop feel-good theories to explain the rejection of the truth, but I say Hebrew history tells us that people just simply don't like Truth. The truth of who God is and the truth of who we are as His created humanity is simply too difficult for the common world to accept.

Our mental health community reminds us, 'The truth will set you free,' but mental health and recovery is a very hard regimen. It is a hard task to learn and accept the truth about oneself.

I'm reminded of a line from the movie Quo Vadis in response to Nero's decision to put people as animal bait as public entertainment: "...along with grain and wine...people will believe any lie if it is fantastic enough."1

We have been privileged to have the great World Wide Web and with it social networking, but an equally heavy responsibility of proof is attached. Information has to be weighed and proven by the truth and sadly the era in which we live has forgotten that brain work takes time and effort.

Do you still want to be the boss? Do you still want influence and seniority? Lady Academia says, 'put up or shut up.'

1 - Quo Vadis script: https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/movie_script.php?movie=quo-vadis
Quo Vadis, based on the novel by Henryk Sienkiewicz, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer (MGM), 1951, directed by Mervyn LeRoy. 

Humanity - My Board, My People, My Employees, My Department,... - No it's not.

Nothing destroys human dignity, self-respect like ignorant and immature arrogance and the way to spot an immature newbie is their common language of self-glorification. Sadly they don't realize they are putting themselves in a totally worthless and troublesome image when they put their co-laborers beneath them. They look and sound stupid to the very people who depend on them.

Regardless of spiritual persuasion, or lack thereof, we as human beings share this world and must respect each other more than ourselves. If we continuously consider the needs of others as more important, then we will become a worthy servant to each other. We will become true professionals  far too busy doing our own work than to be concerned with 'I want to be the boss.' The true CEO or business owner who's priority is to live for others, will not use such insulting language because they must carry the burden of genuine responsibility.

True leaders will always cry out to the Creator as the supreme ruler: Blessed are you O God, Ruler of the Universe. 1

If our Hebrew language is not your taste, try the Latin, 'Non Nobis Domine' 2 or maybe a genuine 'I can't do this without your help, please help me.'

True leaders will always confess their need for help and their own frailties.

True leaders will always do what needs doing at the moment rather than wait for someone else: If a clean paper trash is on the ground for goodness sake, please pick it up and put it in the trash can! In other words, if my Lord and Good Master Jesus is willing to wash my feet, shouldn't I do the same?

True leaders will always live transparent in a glass house. Everyone assumes to know everything about the leader whether true or false with no consequence to themselves. Isolation is one of the heavy crosses in leadership.

True leaders will always step up and take the bullet, the complaint, the full responsibility for someone else with no comment, advertisement, or complaint.

A true leader is true to themselves and others without comment; a true leader gives the reward and takes the punishment.

After all, 'The buck stops here.' 3

1 - Jewish prayer, https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/blessings-for-shabbat-holidays/
2 - Latin prayer, 'Not to us O Lord.' http://www.latin-dictionary.org/Non_nobis,_Domine
3 - Slogan by President Harry S. Truman, https://www.trumanlibrary.org/buckstop.htm

God - A Little Jewish in the Rosary Box

When I was little, my devout, Roman Catholic neighbor was like a grandmother to me and helped teach me about the sanctity of God and humanity. When I married she gave me a rosary box which I have always kept on my dresser or nightstand. With all respect and affection for the Roman faith, I use the rosary box to keep little items that are dear including a few lines of Jewish wisdom. Some are copied from Jewish wisdom literature found in the back of my Union Prayer Book, pew edition as well as other reps of good faith. Again, this is submitted with all reverence to dearest Roman and Hebrew faiths.

1. From Hillel

"When you seek fame it flees;
When you do not add, you detract;
When you do not learn, you earn destruction;
You drive yourself out of the world."

2. From (Christian) Max Lucado, Christmas Candle

"We are deliberately planned,
Specifically gifted, Lovingly positioned."

3. Unknown source

True Understanding what we do not Understand:
"Joy until we face sorrow;
Faith until it is tested;
Peace until we are faced with conflict;
Trust until we are betrayed;
Love until it is lost;
Hope until it is confronted with doubts."

4. Judah HaNassi

Which is the right path for man to choose for himself? Whatever is harmonious for the one who does it, and harmonious for mankind.

Contemplate three things, and you will not come to the hands of transgression: Know what is above from you: a seeing eye, a listening ear, and all your deeds being inscribed in a book.

Food Fight - Lose the battle but win the war, Part 3 - Healthy foods may need limited

Remember to always consult freely your professional medical doctor/provider before you make decisions regarding diet. 

Now for some very traditional healthy foods to be aware, but consider sparingly. Remember to always consult freely your professional medical doctor/provider before you make decisions regarding diet.

Fruits - have natural fructose/sugars and should be limited or avoided.

The juicier the fruit, the more sugar they have: oranges, tangerines, grapefruit, etc.

Skin fruits are high sugar: grapes, prunes, berrys, plums, etc. 

Fruits with seeds are high sugar - apples, pumpkin, watermelon, etc

Bananas are carbohydrates, but they are a good fiber source. Use sparingly or alternate days.

Starches convert to sugar during the digestion process. Avoid anything white:

Use grain/wheat breads. I prefer Joseph brand flax, flat breads or sliced wheat. 

Use baked or boiled russet or sweet potato alternate days

Sweet potatoes can be an alternative; use a little oil and cinnamon which may help with carbohydrate processing. 

Dry, hard shell vegetables such as dry beans are starch but a good fiber source and should be limited: Pinto, butter/lima, split pea, field peas, garden peas, corn, etc. Starches turn to sugar during digestion.

High sodium foods should be limited: cabbage family includes broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage, brussel sprouts, and any 'floret' foods. Juicy vegetables such as tomatoes are seedy and high in sodium.

Dairy foods are good nutritional sources, but high fats: milk, cheese, creams. Use them sparingly.

Always check the nutritional value on the product of the sodium/carbohydrate/sugar content when selecting fresh fruits and vegetables.

Remember to avoid any flour/sugar and fried foods, but boil or bake with a little vegetable oil or water.

Remember to always consult freely your professional medical doctor/provider before you make decisions regarding diet. 

Food Fight - Lose the battle but win the war, Part 2 - Easy foods are the enemy

Remember to always consult freely your professional medical doctor/provider before you make decisions regarding diet. 

To monitor carbohydrates and sodium in your diet, here are grocery items to limit or avoid (as I do) and always, always check and compare the nutrition labels:

Never, never, never buy anything in a box, prepackaged, prepared:

• Instant 'helpers' in boxes - meat dishes, instant cereals, mashed potatoes

These are always high in carbs and sodium for processing and dehydrating; far better to cook the meat yourself and use healthy ingredients.

• packaged meats, with all respect to good kosher brands

Sadly the salts and preservatives are necessary to prevent spoiling; fresh chicken is the only meat I have been able to eat freely without consequence. Again, with all respect and gratitude to Hebrew National foods and other good kosher brands.

• prepared frozen entres

While many brands are trying to help the weight conscience, they are very high in sodium, again, to prevent spoiling. Rice and pasta are both starches and high carbohydrates. 

• bottled beverages (sodas, teas, power drinks, fruit drinks)

Naturally, most are either high sodium (sodas) or high in complex sugars. If you consider the prepared teas, look at the nutritional information for sugars/carbs or sodium content. 

• snacks

Anything prepackaged is to be avoided. Just don't go down 'that' isle. 

• bottled dressings

Again, most will be high sodium for freshness and prevent spoiling. There may be some who really try to promote good health, so check the nutritional information on the label. 

Remember, if you can get it in a machine...don't get it at all, except bottled water. 

The Lord will help us all the way if we try; as well as our good Doctor.

Remember to always consult freely your professional medical doctor/provider before you make decisions regarding diet. 

Food Fight - Lose the battle but win the war

Remember to always consult freely your professional medical doctor/provider before you make decisions regarding diet. 

I can't process carbohydrates or sodium; it's in all foods naturally. In other words, I have to dig a lot of hard ground ditches before I burn a calorie. Here is a list of my food intake in hopes to inspire others who suffer.

I try to stay kosher and avoid red meats; prefer vegetables.

Anytime: Only frozen or fresh vegetables: green beans, carrots, beets

Anytime: fresh chicken with no seasoning

cook white chicken meat over night on medium in a crock pot with a little water; this is my daily work lunch for 3-4 days using Joseph brand flax, flat bread and white vinegar as a season for chicken wrap.

boil dark chicken meat in water on stove for fresh chicken broth and dark meat, no seasoning, then add frozen green beans, frozen carrots, very small amount of celery/very small potato if desired (I just use green beans, carrots). This is my weekday supper.

Alternate days: one medium baked russet/sweet potato with a little pepper and very small olive or vegetable oil. If a sweet potato, use cinnamon freely.

Alternate days: dark green leafy vegetable, always frozen or fresh: spinach, collards, turnips, etc

Alternate days: banana for snack midday or evening supper with two slices of wheat toast instead of the chicken broth with frozen green beans/carrots.

Alternate days: use banana with vanilla ice cream in small bowl at night; my little Chinese cup is the size of a standard computer mouse. The banana is covered with a hint of vanilla ice cream.

Most breakfast foods can be 'wrong' for me, but I try to at least keep kosher and avoid red/any meats.

If at a resaurant one day/week at most: cheeze omlet, sliced tomatoe, dry wheat toast, tea. Cheeze is fatty and tomatoe is high sodium, but not too bad one day/week at most. 

If fast food: egg/cheeze muffin, tea

If rushed at work, during 15-min break Starbucks: wheat/grain bagel no cream cheese, water. At my work, this is the best possible option available if no banana. 

If at the deli for work luncheon:

Wheat wrap/slice, grilled chicken or sliced if necessary (turkey is a good choice, but the tryptophan can make you sleepy on the job), spinach, dark greens, #4 jalapenos for 'fun' (can be high sodium; seedy), green pepper, oil/vinegar or a little mayo to hold it together. Turkey is a good meat to use for supper, before bed time.

If at the fast food for work luncheon:

Grilled chicken sandwich, side salad, oil/venegar dressing, tea

If at any restaurant any time:

Grilled chicken, baked plain potatoe with a little pepper and small amount of veg oil/tiny bit of butter.   

There you have it. Ideally, eat a healthy snack every other hour between meals, but it is not always possible at work.

Remember to avoid all seasoning, sauces, and the color white. As a doctor told my husband, 'If it tastes good, spit it out.'

Remember you can enjoy anytime: cook fresh, frozen low sodium/low starch vegetables; cooked/boiled/baked/grilled chicken; water or tea.

God is with you and will help you; as well as your Good Doctor.

Remember to always consult freely your professional medical doctor/provider before you make decisions regarding diet. 

God - The Host - Cat's in the Cradle in Vegas

My faith teaches all human beings are created in the image of God, the Creator, and the Master of the universe and He has a divine purpose. 

 

If I had children, they would be adults with children of their own. I weep and mourn when I read of people who are ignorant of the sanctity of their lives and divine purpose but freely kill at random. Little ones demonstrate their hopelessness by taking their own life. 

 

I suggest it is because my generation failed miserably to teach our children to fear God and honor human life. The Cold War, Korea, and Viet Nam were so devastating that we were supposed to humble ourselves before God, pray, and fast for the leaders in our country, military, and our church.

We were supposed to selflessly live and practice God's Word for His Glory alone. We failed to humble ourselves before our God and seek His Word. We failed to demonstrate that what we do before the Holy Presence in our church is to continue in our daily lives. We were so distracted by wasteful church programs, promotions, ungodly politics, and marketing, that we did not demonstrate and teach our children the Holy Life before God; a daily life to Honor God and humanity. We turned away from the One True God and created our idol of 'do your own thing.' As a Holiness separate people, we enjoyed judging and condemning others who had never been taught the Way of Christ rather than heed His warning, '...it will be as a millstone on our neck and we are cast in the sea' (Matthew 18.6). The religious hypocrite-play actors all went to church every time the door opened and left just as they entered with no repentance and hunger for God but continued in their criticisms, bigotry, and constant raving against people they pretended to love, and the children were completely attentive at the Sunday dinner table. 

 

Now our bored, 30, 40, 50-year-old children will not earn a living but will be paid by our government to stay on their couch entertaining their desires. When they become bored, they kill. Our neglected little grandchildren take their own lives in complete hopelessness because they never learned about a personal God who loves them and there are no adults they can trust. Our generation taught us only to disrespect God and our leadership. The late 50's television programs with their disrespectful humor toward our government and churches taught that we have to live for ourselves because we cannot trust our government, our parents, or civil authority. Celebrities advertised every smoke, drink, and habit to make us feel good. It follows that people kill at random and small pre-pubescent children take their own lives. 

 

Desperately wanting the best life possible, I worked jobs to save for their schooling; 

but missed their sorrow after the playground fight and their triumphant victory at the game. 

My children were safe at home enjoying the sitcoms TV who mocked parents, teachers, law, and church.

 

The PTA needed volunteer help and offered some important referral names; 

neglecting my children for a few names who knew college administrators.

My children were safe at home learning all about the needle.

 

I was called into work and they promised me a raise;

I missed the call from the nurse's office... 

I missed the call from the police station...

But didn't miss the funerals.  

As I receive the Blessed Host during Holy Communion, I wonder if I am guilty of the Savior's blood. I wonder why 'my son' killed and was killed so freely...or why my 'precious grandchildren' are too afraid to go to school and would rather feel empowered by the cause they can believe in with the mob rioting outside.

 

Yes, I think we missed teaching our children as our parents taught us who God is and how very precious we are in His sight.

 

Starting right now...now is the time of Salvation and now is the time to teach our children/grandchildren well: Who God is and how very precious we are in His sight.

 

After all, when we attend the Holy Mass do we not partake of the Blessed Host?

Our Lord Jesus will help us. Our Lord Jesus will save us. Will we ask?

 

Cat's in the Cradle, by Sandy & Harry Chapin

http://harrychapin.com/music/cats.shtml

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Copyright 1996-2009 HarryChapin.com: The Harry Chapin Archive. 

Critics - whatever. Part 2 and final word.

Has a critic ever helped edify another human being or tried to preserve life in some way? There may very well be some who really want to use their fortune for good and live a very philanthropic life.

Here are some ideas for those who are called to be a critic with all respect to the profession that seeks to improve quality:

1. Before you criticize the healthcare providers, find the cure and give it freely.

2. Before you criticize the law, try intervention on at-risk youth and prevent their life of crime.

3. Before you criticize the cost, produce and provide the products freely.

4. Before you criticize the food and waitstaff, open a soup kitchen for the homeless.

5. Before you criticize the art, produce something everyone will enjoy.

6. Before you criticize the builder, work in and for dirt.

7. Before you criticize education, provide the full scholarship; I'll take it.

Grandma told me if it's not true, don't say it; if it's not necessary, don't say it; and if it is not kind, don't say it.

Grandma has the final word.

Critics - Whatever.

To every critic, I have to ask, 'What have you done to make this issue better?'

When people have criticized or complained about me in my life, I always hoped they would teach me another way to think, act, or pray so they would have nothing to complain about. If only they would have shared their understanding with me rather than express their dislike to their associates; if only they could have helped me be a better person.

Critics would not have a job or income without the failings of others. It is sad that in relationships people seem to enjoy the failings of others as though a free entertainment or hearing an inner mantra, 'I'm glad that's not me' as they stand on the sidelines taking a video to post on social networks or call their friends on the phone, 'You'll never guess who I just saw and what they did.' Sadly, social networking rarely involves the search for truth. Humanity has become the prize for the thrill of the chase.

Respect for humanity is a constant, exhausting task that often demands the highest work ethic. Do we love watching evil so much that we have become numb to the suffering of others?

What happened to us? Why doesn't anyone call for help when seeing a violent assault or someone in an emergency situation?

How many onlookers does it take to overpower a crazed attacker with a baseball bat?

If the bat is scary, are there no other options such as cell phone 911 or scream 'Help.'

How many onlookers does it take to ask someone in distress, 'Can I help you?' 

Onlookers waited and depended on the survalance devise to help the boy dying...he died, but I suppose they thought it's ok since there was a working security devise.  

Now I am at retirement age and all I have to offer is, 'if only someone could have an easier life than I had.'  Not only God has freely given His wisdom, but life lessons came hard and very clearly understood by God's mercy and grace. So the bread cast on the waters, just as my sins carried away by the current, I freely give my mistakes and my triumphs.

What is there to lose?

Prayer - My Heartland

I heard a good Buddhist movie line: "Rich manure can fertilize fields which will feed millions" (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0245803/quotes, Bullet Proof Monk).

I own a piece of land of no real significance, but property none the less. It's mine because no one wants to buy it.

I've tried everything to make it workable and profitable in some way with no good results. I've even asked people who claimed authority to help me in my efforts to make this land worthwhile, but they were not the authority they claimed. Now I'm back to worthless land and their worthless products.

I'm so very tired of my life being so wasted and used for nothing.

With a broken heart and finding no further options, I gave up my efforts to produce any good thing from this land and accepted the harsh reality that this land is worthless.

One day in my despair, a good rain came along with a new hope that this land just may come alive with a good crop. What seemed to be worthless fertilizer, helped heal the earth along with the good rain God gave.

Could it be that the false helpers unknowingly provided an effective fertilizer to make a good soil that would bring the good crops?

It could be that sometimes the effects of false news, gossip, or any information not proved by truth is nothing more than fertilizer and God's reminder that we need to pray. When we pray asking God first for the truth, it is like a good rain.  Only then, we can feed countless of hungry people.

Fertilizer is the dreadful conditions that move us to pray and the good rain is our prayers.

God, please help us feed hungry people everywhere.

God bless our precious country and the whole world.

Romani and the Lilly in the Valley

There are a lot of nomadic people groups in our world. Some have been nomadic by their own tradition and choice such as the Mongolians or Bedouins.  I have a lot of compassion for groups who throughout history were forced to leave their homes to wander the world such as the Romani, Hebrew, and now our dear Syrian friends.

The despised people who wander the world with no rest or sense of belonging remind me of our own valley experiences of fatigue, anxiety, and sickness. Feeling like an outcast or an unwelcomed can be a powerful force pushing us forward in our search for rest and peace as though seeing the Lilly of the Valley on the side of the rough road. In my faith, Lord Jesus is often referred to as the Lilly of the Valley in our scripture just for this reason; because we find abundant hope and life in the most barren valleys of our souls. Just as we push forward through our afflictions, we always have the reminder of the Lilly of the Valley.

I suppose we can thank Lilly of the Vally for preserving such great cultures during great historical diasporas.

May God heal and bless dispersed people everywhere. God have mercy on me and on the whole world.

Death and Dying - Post Mortem Planning - Just put it in the offering plate

My organs and body are nothing to desire or valuable. I have accepted being a fat, old, white lady who suffers obesity and remains resolute to give my best as much as possible. I pray that anything I have left when I die will be of some value to someone and make sure that no one is burdened with my end life planning.

My faith dictates a bodily resurrection which seems to encourage a bodily burial. I think no matter my choices, God can easily provide me with a new body; another faith belief. The bodily burial seems a waste of potential helpful materials.

Cremation is cost-efficient but seems a waste of materials. If my death is caused by an unknown contagion, I hope incineration will not be required but scholarly research can be made to protect and prevent outbreaks.

I like our Tibetan Buddhist friends who may offer the body to carnivorous birds on a high mountain. But God has called the carnivorous birds non-Kosher because they have enough work to do cleaning up man's messy biological debris and really shouldn't be bothered with more labor. Please leave the hard workers alone. The idea of freely giving such a low-quality offering as my poor body seems a bit hypocritical.

When I was little, a playmate mentioned I could sleep with the fish. The principals in water burial are the same as the Tibetan Sky Burial and simply not an option.

I have never liked the idea of cryogenics as it seems to violate my faith in the all-wise Creator and quite a selfish idea in some way. God gave me life, it's only a good thing to submit to His perfect wisdom to end my life.

Chemical preservation using formaldehyde is absolutely not an option; 'why' and 'eww' comes to mind with respect to Lenin, Bentham, and others so inclined. Again, 'ewww.'

I've thought of organ donation, but I really don't have the heart to burden someone with my poor eyes and no ability to process carbohydrates or sodium. I have all compassion to others who suffer obesity.

I tend to lean toward donating this cadaver to science and beg our health professionals and students to find a cure for this awful obesity. I cry for all so afflicted. Medical students need to learn before they become professionals and if one might find a cure, the world would indeed be a far better place to live. Maybe people would be less complaining and more active in the fight against hate.

Submitted selfishly and with some humor, but with profound respect to friends who are so inclined.

Hazing part 3 - Post Wedding - Final Chapter

Just say, 'No.'

Say no before the assault;

Say no before the insult;

Say no before the slap;

Say no before the insinuation;

Say no before the theft

of trust and respect.

Put up your right hand and make the vow before your attackers and say, 'No.'

Just say 'No' as you would say to a rapist.

God - Tear, Snowflake, Feather

The Benevolent Creator made each single tear, snowflake, and feather unique. Every teardrop that may fall has the perfect makeup for a radiant snowflake. If God has such a great purpose for tears, snowflake, and feathers, then, certainly He has a purpose for humanity.

Tears of joy or sorrow are God's way of cleansing our eye gate and our souls from distractions that would prevent our divine calling. God loves humanity and wants His best for us as we live to honor Him and each other. God uses each single tear for His own unique purpose for our good.

Tears become snowflakes when our hearts become cold and indifferent to the needs of others as though we lose our way in a very barren trail of white and we can't see God's rainbow of promise or fresh flowers. Winter allows us a time of solitude in a fresh, clean environment to release each tear so we can watch God reveal Himself through the wonder of a snowflake. Snowflakes cannot exist without Winter.

Finally, after tears and snowflakes have fallen, we finally reach the mountain peak and become the feather on the Breath of God. 1

The Great Creator's purpose for us is just that simple so we can do no harm.

1. Hildegard of Bingen. Feather on the Breath of God. [Place of publication not identified]: Hyperion records, 1986.

Usual Prayers - Lord, Christ, Lord Have Mercy

Upon hearing For King and Country's new song, O, God Forgive Us, the shuddering reminder of my sin stopped my thoughts and motion. Frozen I listened and suddenly questioned my life religious education of childhood prayers, church worship, religious customs, and teachings.

I prayed with no believing or conviction. I enjoyed the applause for dressing the part.

I anointed with oil the sick and needy. My name was in the morning paper listing my donations.

I stood proud and exemplary for spiritual accomplishments. Everyone kept a distance calling it respect.

I tried to talk to Jesus today, but no one allowed me.

I tried to talk about Jesus today, I was given a citation.

I tried to comfort others in Jesus Name, only to be mocked.

Then I remembered my sin. O, O, God Forgive Me.

Written by: JOEL DAVID SMALLBONE, KEVIN BURGESS, LUKE SMALLBONE, SETH DAVID MOSLEY

Lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc., CAPITOL CHRISTIAN MUSIC GROUP

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind

https://www.lyrics.com/lyric/31167864/for+KING+&+COUNTRY/O+God+Forgive+Us

Usual Prayers - Mindless like the Air we Breathe

People who honor God and humanity always pray as though praying is as mindless as the air we breathe. We can't really see it, we ignore it, we simply breathe without a thinking; often we just pray without thinking.

Prayer consumes us as the air we breathe. Our first conscious thought when we first wake up is, 'Blessed are you Creator of the Universe; thank you for your eternal love for me to allow me another day to honor you and humanity.'

As we put our feet in our house slippers, we pray, 'Let your Word guide my steps today that I might not sin against You.'

As we brush our teeth, we pray, 'Bridle my tongue and place a watch over lips...be glorified in my thoughts, words, and deeds today.'

As we wash our hair, we pray, 'Help me love you with all my heart, mind, soul and strength.'

As we wash our feet, we pray, 'Lead me in Your ways; help me follow Your paths of righteousness.'

As we brush our hair, we pray, 'All glory belongs to You who are all Worthy to be praised.'

As we put on our shirt, we pray, 'Grant me the mantle of Your holiness and wisdom that every decision will be ordered by You alone.'

As we put on our skirt/pants, we pray, 'Clothe me in Your clothes of righteousness and Truth that I may only reflect Your holiness.'

Before we eat, we pray, 'Thank you for this food and bless it to nourish us for Your use; bless the hands that prepared it.'

As I drive to work, 'All Glory and Praise to the Lamb that was slain, who has born every sin and cleansed every stain.'

As I clock in for work, 'Stamp me as Your's alone; cast me not away, but accept me as your eternal servant.'

As I enter my work space, 'I dedicate this new work day and space to You that I may accomplish Your Perfect Will for Your glory alone.'

I suppose, in other words, prayer is totally and absolutely just natural.

Shema.

Lady Academia - Most ignorant laborer

One way to recognize an intellectual is their superior work ethic as they search for the Truth of Christ in all matters. In the true academic community, assumptions, judgment, and condemnations do not exist, because there is the constant search for facts and truth as though a life depends on the work.

The academic environment is full of people who have no answers, but constantly and humbly seek. They demonstrate the sanctity of freedom to search for truth as they learn. They begin a hard journey toward truth with nothing to help them but the heavy burden of proof.

In academia, there is no social class system or hierarchy, but all human beings are permitted equally to search for truth; the very freedom and opportunity freely given by our soldiers' constant sacrifice.

The academic community never sleeps, but is vigilant in the fight against the very evil that would destroy human life through assumption, bigotry, aggression, and tyranny. All human beings are permitted to take up the fight against the simple and search for truth.

It was indeed Lady Academia who gave 'Juris Prudence' (Justitia) her blindfold to search, scales of proof, and sword of authority.

So I call on all brave, stout, and ready souls to take up the heavy cross of learning and take the courage to climb the unknown road to enlightenment. Jesus promised you will never be alone.

Easy Solution to all our Problems

Stop thinking hate.

Think only on the honor of Creator and humanity.

Hazing part 2 - Wedding Engagement

No Hazing Allowed.

Regardless of culture, you have agreed and selected a life partner, soul mate, and hopefully a best friend. All hazing, initiation, gauntlet, or any such practice has absolutely no place in your/your partner's life. It is your job to protect your partner from any such brutality of physical or mental forms. Never, never allow any form of oppression or retardation to enter you/your partner's life and home.

You and your partner's parents raised you to become who you are now; who you chose to marry. You chose them for their good, adult character and you and your partner must encourage each other in your future growth.

The home you and your partner make is your life, your place of refuge, your place of edification and spiritual growth and there is no place for any outside interference. All life emotions of joy and sorrow are always freely given and shared in marriage by the married couple and never imposed by outside the home. That is why joys are doubled and sorrows are halved in marriage of two people.

The above declaration is the absolute love quality test of all parents and siblings. Will they respect and trust you with their loved one? The answer must be 'yes.' Will they demand seniority when that word alone has no place whatsoever in a healthy relationship? The answer must be 'no.'

Here are boundaries that must be respected by parents, siblings, relatives, and friends:

1. I respect your home as a sacred place. Therefore I do not participate in arguments, contentions out of respect for your sacred place. Please do not expect such negative behavior from me.

2. Our finances and health/bedroom matters are private. They are never your business.

3. Your differences and cultural identity is fully respected and enjoyed; please return the dignity we show you toward me and my relatives.

4.  You are not my superior and never my place to obey your commands. I have agreed and accepted this one individual as my life partner and my new family. I am not going to marry you. It is not my place to lower myself to your insults, condescending commands and corrections.  Loving and mutually respectful, shared discussions are always welcomed.

5. I am very close to my parents, siblings and relatives. Please honor and respect that fact as a positive, good character trait. I will not accept any assumptions or ignorant judgments that are contrary. If you as a family want respect, please show it to me and my family.

 Yes, this is an ideal engagement period. Still want to marry?

Never, never place a human beneath you. Slavery is never acceptable.

Remember the golden rule: whatsoever you would they do to you, do to them.

Hazing part 1 - Pre Engagement

No hazing allowed in a Godly loving relationship.

Here are helpful ideas during the period of serious period of dating, going steady, before official engagement:

1. No window shopping. All your attention is on the one individual you are considering as a life partner, soul mate, and best friend.

2. The male, future possible groom must always attend to the bride's family first and foremost in obedience to God's command, 'a man leave his mother and father and cleave to his wife.' He must present himself to them in a humble, respectful manner and ask for the privilege of dating their daughter. Only after the daughter's family is fully honored, the young lady may visit the young man's parents. If this is not observed, the groom is simply too immature and not prepared for the cost of true love.

3. Parents getting to know the girl/boy friend is absolutely essential; parents deserve the highest respect and dignity at all times. Cruel testing is never appropriate by anyone. Open, honest and truthful communication is a holy privilege as well as a responsibility for all.

4. If the boy or girl is placed beneath, it is always wrong. No one has the right ever to rule over another in God's kingdom. Mutual respect and common courtesy is always the rule. If the boy is seen as a 'knight in shining armor/hero' it is not healthy and will never be the gentleman of godly character every lady requires. If the girl is seen as helpless and 'needs' him/his family, this is not healthy and will never grow to be the lady God intended.

5. The couple can never tolerate anyone who will degrade them. If the boy seems to enjoy his family hurting his girlfriend or vice versa and the parents will not apologize or make restitution, the union is not God's will.

Do unto others as you would have them do to you. Any loving relationship is always full sacrifice and never seeking to receive.

The Eyes Say It All - The Mirror

Our eyes are one of the soul gates or senses used to send information to the human soul or brain. It is very easy to become what we allow our eyes to see, and then people can clearly see what we have become just by looking at our eyes. 

The eyes seem to reflect our inner thoughts.
The eyes reflect the truth of who we are.
As I look with my eyes, I have absorbed the ideas so freely given through simple processing.

I see
I wonder
I think
I become
I do

When I do what I used my eyes to see, I hope my eyes will always say, 'Please Honor God and humanity.'

To Rachel and Christopher

Just a few little reminders...constant reminders in this life, until our Blessed Lord returns and lest you forget why the elders constantly push, nag, and seem to impose; this is why:

1. You are never a slave. I don't want you/s to be the slave people have tried to make me through prejudice and bigotry.

2. You will not just survive by hand-mouth income. I don't want you/s to depend on a low income for survival.

3. You will not be coerced or manipulated. I don't want you/s to suffer paranoia imposed by others.

4. You will not be discarded. I don't want you/s to become victims of ignorance/naive.

5. You will have the best of education. I want you/s to live always with the best of choices.

6. You will trust and obey God. I don't want you/s to live without a faith in a benevolent Jehovah God that will work for your best. God says, 'Never settle' because we believe in the Biblical doctrine of Adoption. God is our Heavenly Father who always provides the best for us. 

7. You will always live in peace. I want you/s to know God loves you supremely and your Mom/Dad, grandparents, and I pray for your best daily. You cannot have the perfect peace without God and your praying family who desperately want the best life for you just for your own sake, not ours. 

Study - Fraternity - Not the Flat

While living in a southern college dormitory for five years, I learned a little about getting along. I was 18 years old and alone in a very different culture than where I came from in the North East United States 500 miles away. I was terrified of my southern classmates which comprised most of the school and because of the drastic cultural differences, I was utterly alone.

College roommates are strangers suddenly thrown together in a very small space without any choice. The experience can create a wonderful friendship or a very dangerous enemy. I pray some of my ideas will only help create loving and respectful, life-long friendships.

Without further ado, here are some practical pointers that helped me survive the college dorm life in a very strict religious school:

1. Always use the 'Golden Rule' which is: Do unto others as you want them to do to you. If you follow this completely, you will be released from any guilt knowing you have been the best friend possible. Trust and Respect are absolutely necessary for any relationship especially a roommate. Agreements are never necessary to acceptance. Respect and enjoy the differences.

2. Immediately and continuously communicate openly and try to agree on living terms and arrangements: sleep patterns, use of shower/toilet, times for solitude, media, foods/drinks, air, phone tunes, allergies, medical issues, etc. Any issue that affects your natural senses should be carefully examined (audio visual elements in your life).

3. Never have valuables in the open, but keep them locked in a personal locker or safety deposit box in the local bank or postal service. This prevents unnecessary temptation and destruction of a positive relationship.

4. Keep your own belongings in your assigned positions: closet, shelves, drawers. Immediately agree on the area boundary: your side and their side must be respected.

5. Keep your own belongings clean: use @Lysol solids to neutralize your shoes or soiled laundry, air dry washcloths, towels, or wet clothing before placing them in the laundry basket. This will prevent odors while waiting to wash. If possible, use @Odor Eaters in your shoes and around your shoe lockers to prevent odors. @Tylex brand bath cleaners are best if possible. Note: never mix clorox and ammonia...this is fatal.

6. Keep your bedding and under your bed clean at all times. I recommend bathing in mornings and evenings if possible; this keeps bedding fresh until the weekly change.

Disagreeable odors/rank/stench always challenge positive living and thinking. Keep your room as neutral as possible by using clean air products rather than perfume/cologne fragrances; especially in the lavatory.

7. When listening/watching media, always use headsets unless you and your roommate agree to a specific program. Avoid excess lighting (TV, PC, laptop, etc) if your roommate is trying to sleep.

8. If your roommate is sleeping, it is always a good time to sleep as well. If not, let them have the room or study quietly. It may be a good time to use the library, student center, or lounge. Sleep is a very private activity providing refuge.

9. Take turns using the room privately. If you have a class or job, they can use the room and vice versa. Never demand physical contact or togetherness; everyone needs solitude at times. The six-inch rule and respect for space are vital toward a positive relationship when rooming in a small space.

10. Ideally always study in the library, student center, etc. Your room is a refuge from the stress of academics; a place to rest and relax.

11. If you make the mess, you clean it up immediately regardless of time, appointment. Wash your own dirty dishes, vacuum your own living space, Never let any accident, mishap, spill, drop, of any form remain. Always make complete and thorough corrections with utmost haste. Your mistakes/corrections are always your own personal responsibility that always reflects in your professional career. I never want to see a physician who cannot clean up their own mess.

12. Take full and immediate responsibility if you cause the destruction of property and make immediate restitution. Open communication is vital to promote trust and respect in your relationship with a roommate.

Finally, never demand a friendship or even positive relationship. Just being physically close in a room is demanding enough, but do your part and you will live with the assurance you have been at your best for the good of others. Use your room for sleep and use sanitary earplugs if necessary.

If you and your roommate cannot live together after all the best efforts, consult the campus resident life for a change. I recommend staying with the same roommate despite differences or conflicts; they are supposed to be solved through mutual trust and respect. Sometimes the opposite can become your best friend.

Be Like Jesus- Impossible?

The American Soldier is just like Jesus.

It is possible.

God - Sometimes I Get Cross - Understanding

While anger can be managed most of the time, there are occasions when I get cross. I get very angry when there are no answers to urgent questions, problems, or my own sin-restitution. Resources are exhausted and every effort to find solutions seem wasted. I feel responsible, guilty, accountable, inadequate and then get cross.

Why am I full of feelings I shouldn't have? Why are there no solutions for the urgent matters at hand? When I get to the lowest position, I get to the foot, base, root of the cross and hold on for life. I find the best and safest position is at the foot of the cross...the bottom, lowest, ground, beneath the Cross of Jesus.

I hear Our Lord say, 'Forgive her, Anita needs a Savior' or 'Come to me Anita, I will give you rest.' When I finally release and surrender my failings, I can finally hear as though Our Lord Jesus say,

"Arise, my soul, arise,
shake off your guilty fears;
The bleeding sacrifice,
in my behalf appears;
Before the throne my Surety stands,
Before the throne my Surety stands,
My name is written on His hands." John Wesley (1703-1791)

Then I get The Cross.